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North Korea Cargo Drop

North Korea has agreed to allow IAEA inspectors back into its country and to halt its nuclear weapons production, in return the US is sending 200,000+ tons of food for its people. This comes as a shock to many who were unsure if North Korea’s new leadership would take a hardline approach on its foreign policy. The agreement was reached in Beijing, but a press release by new North Korean leader from Pyongpyang summarized the shift in policy.

I’m starving” said Kim Jong-Un “I haven’t had anything to eat in like 8 hours, all we have to eat is rice and cabbage, I want real food.”

The US delivery of food is expected to contain 10,000 orders of #1’s off the McDonalds Menu, 5,000 Happy Meals and 10,000 orders of the Colonels Extra Crispy Family Package. The special orders will be delivered to the supreme leaders palace with the other tons of food for the general populace. “All this time we’ve been deterring then with military might and economic sanctions” said a Senior CIA Analyst “Who knew they could be bought off with some greasy fast food and some crappy plastic toys?” Talks of reunification are expected to follow after this recent development and will begin with a diplomatic visit by Playmate Models. “After seeing their reaction to our food, we think we can pretty much run the table on them once they see some fake titties.”

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